"Ich bin meine eigene Frau..."

the infamous listen bird. (which is not actually advertising for Listen Records.)

Last weekend I had the good fortune of seeing a beautiful play at the Citadel – ‘I Am My Own Wife’ by Doug Wright, performed by John Ulyatt. It was one of those one-person-playing-multiple-character-shows that I find so engaging & truly amazing. To watch someone change characters by the subtlest, yet most crucial gesture, – the tilt of the head, the heaviness of a footfall, all before speaking. It was brilliant, as was the set design, with all the vintage furniture suspended from the ceiling in the dark recesses of the stage, at times softly illuminated...

The story was very compelling as well – it was based on Doug Wright’s own interviews with Charlotte von Mahlsdorf, directly inspired by her taped oral histories that he researched in the early 1990s. In short, Charlotte was an East German transvestite who led a tumultous and colourful life as a furniture collector and antique museum curator, surviving an abusive father, as well as both WW2 and the Cold War... I do not want to give too much away here – her story should really be seen, experienced if possible (the play is over now, but the script is published and quite easy to find at a University library, I’m sure) so I should just say that her life story is definitely compelling and unbelievable.

One of the recurrent issues in the play is the ‘truth’ of Charlotte’s stories; the narrator (Doug himself) and other characters continually return to this problem, distressed because they cannot match her memories with the documented facts. The play deals beautifully with this issue, I think, and through Charlotte he reveals something very crucial about the practice of collecting oral histories, and the intrinsic truth present in any individual’s recollections of her life.

I will paraphrase Charlotte herself in saying that we must accept her stories and she herself accepted each piece of furniture that she found -- unperfected, unadorned, untainted by polish or authoritative voice, simply as is. Her stories are truths in that they are her ‘telling of herself’, her own perception and mediation of the story of her life, and they are thus full of truth, in all their complexity and contradiction. She preserved her stories, collected them like her furniture, memories illuminated in ornate clusters, suspended, arranged, sometimes tangled, but all there, all part of her life. She presented her stories just as she pulled old antiques out of a box, randomly, out of linear order. Is a shiny repainted cabinet a more truthful cabinet than one covered in scratched and fading stains? I would think it is almost less so, because then we are not seeing any record of its experience, that is being hidden from us for the sake of appearances.

If we want to actually understand Charlotte’s life, it is better to go to her memories and personal experiences, rather than Stasi files or German talk show hosts. Bryna and I discussed this in depth after the play, and we both see this play as being supportive the value of plural histories, and oral history as an important research method. Whether or not one even believes in a definitive, objective truth, this play eloquently shows us that finding one grand ‘truth’ matters little in coming to deeply understand one person’s life experiences and motivations. ‘I Am My Own Wife’ is Charlotte’s truth, and also Doug’s truth as the mediator between her words and the audience. His writing is reflexive, but never overpowering, and he conveys their relationship simply and eloquently.

One of my favourite bits:

[Charlotte]: …This table, he is over one hundred years old. If I could, I would take an old gramophone needle and run it along the surface of the wood. To hear the music of the voices. All that was said…

I am so glad I got to see it. I remember Audrey telling me about it after she saw it first in New York City two years ago, how amazing it was. Mostly I recalled her mention of the ‘lion picture’ but I shall not reveal that secret now.

***

Last Wednesday I also got to hear Wade Davis speak – (or, rather, orate documentary-style!) He seems to be traipsing across the country with some lovely photography in tow, and I very much enjoyed what he had to say. (I also covet his National Geographic explorer-in-residence position. I would like to take over when he retires....) He mostly touched on subjects he has covered in his newest book, ‘Light at the Edge of the World’ and an upcoming documentary, and while I wished in many cases he could go into depth about what he was mentioning, I was just glad to hear these subjects discussed.

He talked mostly on the incredible importance of biodiversity / cultural diversity and the (hopeful!) persistence and adaptability of culture. I was especially happy that he mentioned language endangerment and the connection of language to cognitive system. He spoke so passionately about the respect needed for multiple systems of knowledge, for indigenous worldviews to be valued on the same level as industrial/Western scientific knowledge, that I wanted to run up and give him a hug.

His discussion of sacred geography and examples of Quechua communities in Peru also interested me – I was not so aware of the exact symbolism of the layout of Macchu Picchu. I am so enthralled with the image of the Urubamba river (below the city) being the earthly parallel of the Milky Way, the glacier of the sky. It makes perfect sense now, really... His descriptions of the village pilgrimages, especially the one where the whole community runs up and down the sacred peaks surrounding the village in a ritual, mappable pattern to rebalance the feminine energy of the earth goddess Pachamama was so beautiful, and especially provocative considering my obsession with landscape and toponymy right now. I am hoping to write a paper soon for my northern language issues class that somehow deals with landscape and its place in unifying community and asserting group and individual identities (through language).

Davis's book Light at the Edge of the World (which contains many of the same photos!) is waiting for me at the library and I am excited. I am taking full advantage of my not-sleeping to read & read & read...